I Would Write Something Clever Here, But My Brains Are Too Fried From Raising Quints

As I stare at sweet little Logan, I can't help but smile.

It's 2:30 in the morning. I have just spent the last four hours trying to get all five babies to go to sleep. Logan is the last one down...well, I guess not if you count me. I'm going to hit the hay for a couple hours before waking up and doing it all over again. Vicki tapped out around midnight, and I refuse to make her stay up with me when she has school in the morning. Whether I like it or not, this task is mine. Thank God tomorrow morning they're aging into toddlers.

Mason, being the first born, ages up first. He has my nose and chin...maybe my eyes, but he has his father's strange pale green eye color. He is the ring leader...the strong one...the solid one. It's funny, already he reminds me of Wrath...which makes me miss him.

Jules is the next one up...she's already proving to be extremely smart...too smart for her own good. She has my black hair with red streaks and her father's light green eyes and coloring.

Isobel is the next one down the line. She is a funny one. She's also a trouble-maker. She and Jules play together a lot. Jules comes up with some mischief and Isobel acts it out. Of the five, she probably looks the most like me. We have the same eyes and smile.

My sweet Rose is next. She is the nurturer. Already, whenever one of her siblings falls and hurts themselves, she crawls over and comforts them in her way. She offers them her dolls, toys, candy...pretty much anything she can think of that might comfort them. She looks a lot like Wrath. She and Jules look the most alike.

The youngest is Logan. He was born a little smaller than the others and has been trying to catch up ever since. He's quiet and thoughtful. He likes to sit and contemplate things often.

I am starting to believe that Vicki is really an angel. She wakes up extra early, even on school days, gets all the kids out and gives them bottles...there's no trying to get them all into high chairs and feeding them...no, my normal schedule is completely out the window with this crew!

After Vicki feeds them, she gets herself some breakfast and heads off to school...and that's when Mama vs. the Quints starts. I have to get them all cleaned up and dressed, which takes on average thirty minutes per child...so that's two and a half hours...and by then someone's hungry, or needs to potty, or wants Mommy to hold them...actually most of the time at least two of them need my attention at the same time...then the ones that I have settled and playing start fighting over the toys...ugh, I literally have time for nothing but taking care of these five little ones.

You know how when you have triplets, it's hard, but at some point either they're all sleeping, or are all pacified and you can sit down and relax, or get some house work done, or cook dinner? Yeah, with quints, that never happens. You never have those moments when you can just breathe.

So Vicki and I have been working on their skills frantically, which is difficult as well. I can generally get two, maybe three of them to the potty chair in time to work on potty training, but I always have at least two that have messy diapers.

So as far as teaching them all to walk and talk, if I ever catch a moment when none of them need me, I grab up the closest child to me and start teaching them something.

Rose is the first to learn to talk. I suppose that's good because she always has sweet things to say...and she has good manners. It's so cute listening to her say, "Pwwweeeeeaaaasssse!"
I can't help but jump for joy. At this point it's the little things.

Mason is next. I try to get at least two of them taught per day, then Vicki can generally handle one. Potty training goes on all the time, just whenever we can catch them needing to go!

Of course, bedtime is still a nightmare. They all get tired around the same time, but they all need a nighttime bottle, a potty break, and then need to be put to bed. Since Vicki and I cannot possibly get them all taken care of, we have to endure a LOT of screaming...

Poor Vicki shouldn't have to put up with all this, but I suppose that was just the hand she was dealt. She pulls through it like a champ, and she's almost used to the entire house smelling of poop...ALMOST...

Logan is generally always the last one down and he's usually so exhausted, he's half asleep and crying before I even get him in the crib.

And of course, by the time my day is over with, I am exhausted and go straight to bed. I haven't painted since they were born, I barely eat, thank goodness for the plasma fruit I always carry around with me.

There is however, a couple of phone calls I need to make. The first is to Sergo.
Sergo: Hello?
Me: What kind of fertility treatment was it that Dr. Skelton gave me?
Sergo: I honestly don't know, Hadley. you're going to talk to him.
***Click***

I hang up on him and dial Dr. Skelton. Hmm, apparently that is a vampire trait.
Receptionist: Dr. Skelton's office, how may I direct your call?
Me: I need to speak with Dr. Skelton immediately.
Receptionist: Dr. Skelton is busy at the moment...can I have him call you back?
Me: No, here's what you can do for me...this is Hadley Reed...go get him, pull him out of whatever he's doing right now, and put him on the phone or he can be sure that the next time he comes to my house he will be leaving with two black eyes and a couple toddlers.
Receptionist: (pause) Okay, Ms. Reed, I'll get him.
***Cheesy Hold Music***
Dr. Skelton: Ms. Reed, how is my favorite patient?
Me: Your favorite patient has a bone to pick with you, doc.
Dr. Skelton: Yes, I expected a call from you.
Me: So...I assume you know what I'm about to ask you...just what in the name of all things holy did you give me to "enhance" my fertility so much?...actually, no, what I really need to know is: Is it still in my system and will it effect my next pregnancy?
Dr. Skelton: I apologize, Ms. Reed, it's obvious that my fertility serum still needs some tweaking...
Me: Ha! I would say so! Is this something I'm going to have to have corrected?
Dr. Skelton: No, I gave you that serum right before you conceived, and it should have worn off by now...
Me: Should isn't good enough, doc...
Dr. Skelton: (silence, sigh) Well, unfortunately, that's all we have. It should have worn off, but we can't be sure until your next pregnancy.
Me: SO I COULD END UP WITH ANOTHER FREAKIN' LITTER? Well, that's just great.
Dr. Skelton: I can't give you anything to counteract it because it might interfere with your ability to conceive. You don't want to loose the ability to have children all together, do you?
Me: Would it be wrong of me to say at this point I don't really care?

Dr. Skelton doesn't say anything and I just hang up the phone...mostly because the kids have started screaming again. BIG surprise.

Thankfully, Vicki gets home from school and hands out the dinner bottles.

I am nearly at my wits end by Saturday morning. Vicki wasn't awake yet, so I decided to do the morning feedings, which meant I had to endure a chorus of screaming.

I decide to let go of my control freak nature...everyone stays in pajamas, I let the quints play while I whip up some Plasma Fruit Pancakes for Vicki and myself. Vic looks like she's about to crack too.
"What's the plan for the day, Mom?" Vicki asks.
"Let's work like hell to teach everything and age them up as soon as possible," I reply.
"I like that plan," she says.

So we work our a$$e$ off, potty-training, teaching to walk, teaching to talk...and before you know it, Logan, who has always been a little delayed, is taking his first steps by himself!

THANK YOU, LORD, WE MADE IT!

It's birthday time for the quints!

Mason, still in blue, ages first. His piercing green eyes always look as though they're staring right through you.

Though Jules likes wearing her hair in pigtails, she loves her football jersey. I'm not really sure what the attachment is, but I let her wear it.

Isobel always has that look that she's up to something on her face. Her teenage years are going to be difficult, I can already tell.

Rose ages up next. She's very concerned with learning as much as she can while she's young.

Logan is last, he's sort of the runt, but he wants to work on his athletic ability. I might see if there's a pee-wee soccer team or something he can join.

So we survived the Quints as toddlers...at least that part is over with. I'm surprised Vicki doesn't want to age up and get out right now!

I'm kind of glad she's staying for awhile because I know as soon as she moves out, the next vampire warrior will be coming.