Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Babies 13 & 14: A Vampire Gathering, Hormonal Teenagers, and a Lonely Soul



Even though Pearl was born with the Evil trait, I am determined that she will overcome it. I will shower her with as much love as I possibly can. That's the whole nature vs. nurture argument, right? She might have the evil trait, but if she never gets to use it, she won't be evil. Right? At least that's what I'm hoping.



It's another birthday day in the Reed household, and the youngest are going first...but first everyone has to get up and eat breakfast. "This is the last time you'll have to depend on me for your breakfast, Jenna!"
"Jenna depends on mommy always!" she replies. She has taken to speaking in third person. The doctor told me that's a sign of high intelligence.



Illena, Bonnie, Caroline, Damon, & Alaric all sit down in the dining room and eat breakfast before school. I've found the easiest way to handle birthdays is to let the toddlers and babies age up while the older kids are at school. I know they miss out on the excitement, but sometimes having seven people standing around you blowing horns in your face while you transition from one age to another isn't all that much fun.



First Pearl grows up into a toddler. She has beautiful green eyes and gorgeous brown hair. She looks a little like me, but not near as much as Jenna does.



Jenna grows into a child and wants to wear this purple sundress all the time. She also has the genius trait like Illena, so I'm sure she's going to do well in anything she does.



Right after Pearl and Jenna age up, I find out that I have been publicly disgraced for having a child out of wedlock. Well, thanks for the breaking news, CNN! Since I actually am having children out of wedlock, I don't feel right suing for slander, so I just pay off the paparazzi. This is going to get expensive! I wonder why people care anyway. It's not something I'm ashamed of. There should be some sort of exception for challenge mothers!



Since I'm already out, I go to the salon for a makeover. I decide to put my hair in a side braid and color it dark blonde. It's different...I like it...



I also pick out a new outfit that I can also wear while pregnant. I really like my old outfit, but I want to look a little more like a grownup.



When I get home, I get a phone call from the infamous Winston Sergo.
"Hello, Ms. Reed. How are you?" He asks when I answer.
"I'm fine, Mr. Sergo, how about yourself?" I answer coldly.
"Very well, I am calling because I know that Damon and Alaric are going to be transitioning into young adults this evening." He does get straight to the point, doesn't he?
"They are," I reply, "are you calling to give me special instructions or something?"
"Not exactly," he replies, "I am calling to see if you would consider allowing some members of the Vampire Counsel to witness their transition."



I should have known. "The Vampire Counsel wants to come to my sons' birthday?"
"In short, yes." He answers.
I am silent for a minute.
"Ms. Reed? Are you still there?"



I kind of loose it a little bit.
"You want me to invite a bunch of vampires to my house, where me and my children live - to what? Eat birthday cake?"
I can hear Mr. Sergo sigh. "You do realize that dealing with me would go much smoother if you didn't resort to sarcasm every time we speak?"
"Right, right, whatever," I reply, "so, what purpose is the Vampire Counsel going to serve tonight?"
"They simply want to speak with you and the boys to see firsthand the kind of teenage vampires you have raised."
I roll my eyes. These Vampire Counsel members are awfully darn nosy.
"Fine," I reply, "tell them to be here at eight."
The line goes dead...



Crrraaappp. So now I'm having to host a friggin' vampire party...in my house...with my other kids present...what am I even supposed to feed these vampires?
Oh, that's right...my other kids are here...I'm sure I could interest them in a toddler, or a child, or three pre-teens...ugh! Why me?!



I try to get my mind off of it by teaching Pearl how to talk. I want to at least make sure she's going to be in bed during the party. I don't need her crawling around, tempting anyone.
Oh, not to mention...I think I need to get a new maid service...this creepy guy can't stop freaking out every time he seems me...



When the girls get home, Illena booby-traps the toilet. Hmm...I wonder if vampires pee?



I put everyone to work when they get home from school. I put Damon on Pearl duty. I am really going to miss him and Alaric. They really are great kids. I also go ahead and let the triplets have their birthday.



Illena is still into her black and white clothing. I think she thinks it makes her look older. She is still as hot-headed as ever...if not worse. She always seems to have a scowl on her face.



Where Illena is sour, Bonnie is sweet. She cares so much for others, especially children. She is also beautiful on the outside with her beautiful blue eyes and dark skin.



Caroline is a firecracker. She decided to cut her hair and spike it, putting it into a Mohawk. She also wears tight, ripped clothing. She's all about "expressing herself." She is also a bit neurotic. Sometimes she washes her hands 3 times before she's satisfied.



Right after Caroline ages up, the counsel arrives. The first woman I meet is Naomi Poe.
"Your name sounds familiar..." I mention to her.
"Yes," she replies in acknowledgement, "your son is dating my daughter, Malinda."
"Oh, that's right. Malinda is a lovely girl," I compliment her. I figure buttering her up couldn't hurt.
"She had many good things to say about you," Naomi continues, "I won't lie, it was through Malinda's contact with Embry that we found out you were raising vampire children, but she has always had the opinion that you are an exemplary mother and I must say that I trust my daughter's judgment."
Hmm, so that was it. I nod, "I appreciate your honesty."



The next vampire I meet is Tabitha Gann. She is a delightful woman who immediately puts me at ease by making a joke. "I'm sorry you had to deal with Sergo. I keep telling him to extract that stick from his ass, but he always refuses!"
This makes me laugh. I wish I could ask him the same thing! In fact, I would, but I haven't seen him yet at the party. Hmm, that's weird, I invited him.
Obviously I look a little tense, because Tabitha continues, "Lighten up sweetie, this isn't an execution. We can tell Damon and Alaric are good boys. There might be some uptight S.O.B.'s in our bunch, but me and Naomi have your back."
I smile and thank them both.



The next woman I approach is dancing in shorts and a long t-shirt, even though the dress code was formal. She is relatively young. Her name is Tammi Dooley.
"Very nice to meet you, Ms. Reed." she greets me. I realize she isn't that much older than Damon and Alaric.



Then it's time for Damon & Alaric to transition. Having never seen a vampire transition before, I was naturally concerned when I saw Damon surrounded in red smoke and bats.



Damon grows up into a handsome, muscular, and hairy young man! I don't care what the Vampire Counsel says, I am proud of my son. He wants to be a private investigator.



Alaric ages next. Once again, I can't help but gasp when the transition happens.



Alaric keeps the same hairstyle he had as a teenager and dresses in the flamboyant clothing of an actor. I know he will be a sensational one.

After the boys age up, they move out of the house and the party comes to a close. Everyone thanks me for my hospitality as they leave. Overall, it was a pretty good experience.



With Damon and Alaric gone, I get online and place another order with the sperm bank. This guy's name is Markus Shom. He looks like a good specimen!



The next morning, it's back to my normal mommy duties...like trying to get Pearl to stop playing with her breakfast and eat it.



"Okay, Ms. Silly Pants. I can tell you're not hungry any more. How about we try to use the potty?"



She sits on the potty chair and listens to me like an angel. Maybe she won't be evil. I don't even know what I was worried about.



It's Saturday, so everyone is home. I try my hand at fixing Eggs Machiavellian. They frustrate me because I almost burn them more times than I can count.



Thankfully, they come out fine. Thank goodness!



I sit down with the girls to eat breakfast. Illena is in a sour mood, as always.



Caroline doesn't come out of the bathroom for awhile.
"Are you okay in there, honey?" I call in to her.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she calls out.
"Okay love."
I stop talking and just listen in to the door.



I can hear Caroline talking to herself.
"Okay Caroline, you can do this. Just walk away. Walk away. You don't have to wash your hands anymore...they're raw anyway." Her voice is shaking.
My poor dear.



My little helper, Bonnie teaches Pearl how to walk without me even having to ask her.



Once again, Illena tries to make a potion and singes herself, then when she takes a shower, she breaks it, so I make her fix it herself. Sort of a variation of "You break it, you buy it!" Haha!



Caroline has started working out. I think it helps calm her OCD tendencies. I hope it works for her.



It was shaping up to be a calm weekend because after Bonnie taught Pearl how to talk, she decided to go fishing. She only caught a goldfish, but that's better than nothing, right?



Jenna spends the day up in my reading nook.



While the girls were busy with their hobbies, I was busy with my hobby...puking...ugh...



Of course when I flushed the toilet, I get sprayed...oh no, no, no...not cool. I know exactly who did it too!



"Illena!" I shout, "Guess who just got sprayed by the toilet next to the kitchen?!"
Illena tries to hide a giggle, "Sorry mom..." She isn't sorry at all.



"Yeah, I know you were the one that rigged the toilet, young lady!" I spar.
Much like me, Illena is also hot-headed, so she's ready to spar right back.
"Just how do you know it was me?!" She starts, "Did you SEE me do it? No!"



"Oh, you think you're so smart, don't you?" I say, "but you're not as smart as you think you are, let me tell you."



The stare-down starts...



I'm mad...



She's mad...and neither one of us is willing to apologize, so we storm off.



Then it's dinner time and Illena and I are still not speaking. Have I mentioned that stubbornness runs in my family as well? I know I'm being childish, but for some reason I can't bring myself to apologize before she does. I'm the one that got sprayed with vomit water here!



Illena ignores me and talks to Jenna. "Jen, do you ever get so mad, you just want to punch something?"
Jenna looks at her wide-eyed, "No, not really."



I catch Illena looking sad as she puts up her dish.



Of course, my morning sickness/"all day" sickness strikes again. This time I go to my private bathroom. As I'm crouched down over the toilet I start thinking about apologizing to Illena. I did overreact and some of the things I said to her were out of line.



We meet up with each other in the entry way. "Mom, are you still mad?" Illena looks at me like she's afraid of what I might say.
Tears well up in my eyes and I answer her, "I'm so sorry sweetie. I acted inappropriately. I should never have gone off on you like I did."



She replies, "No mom, I'm sorry. I'm so ashamed. I never should have rigged that toilet. I should know by now that you throw up in those toilets a lot...it must have really sucked to have puke all over you."
I have to agree, "Well, it wasn't pleasant."



I do want to say something though, "I am really sorry for suggesting that you're not as smart as you think you are. You are one of the brightest people I have ever met. I am so proud of you honey."



"So we're good Mom?" Illena asks.
"Of course! I can't stay mad at you anyway."



The rest of the night is uneventful. Caroline plays on the slip and slide...



Jenna, Illena, and Bonnie play on the Wii, and after Pearl goes to bed, I start working out because my stupid agent tells me I have to...ugh!



The next morning, I think it's going to be a good day as well because Illena gets up with Pearl and takes care of her for me.



Aren't my girls beautiful?



Illena even takes Pearl to the potty...we all know what a messy job that can be...



As soon as I think everything is calm and quiet in the Reed household, I hear yelling coming from the dining room. It's Bonnie and Illena.
Bonnie: What is your issue, Illena? I didn't even do anything and you're being a total witch right now!
Illena: Would you just shut up, Bonnie!? Quit being such a goody-two-shoes!



When I come around the corner, I see Bonnie with her finger in Illena's face. Oh Lord, not the finger.
Bonnie: You listen to me, Illena, little Miss Know-It-All. Don't come around here, talking to me like I'm stupid and dishing your crap all over me and think I'm just going to roll over like everyone else does.



Illena starts screaming, "I F****** HATE YOU, Bonnie!"



Bonnie slaps Illena! Oh my goodness...I don't know what to do...I want to break it up, but I'm paralyzed. I never thought I would see one of my children hit another one. I have never allowed violence in my house and I never will.



It gets worse and before I know it they are fighting. There's so much hitting, kicking, pushing, and probably hair-pulling going on, I can't get in the middle without hurting myself...normally I wouldn't care, but I'm pregnant. I can't put my unborn child at risk.



Bonnie ends up knocking Illena to the floor. This is it, I've had enough...



"I never thought I would see the day when two of my children fought like that," I start.
"Bonnie started it..." Illena interjects.


"Quiet!" I continue before stating the words countless parents before me have said, "I don't care who started it, I'm going to finish it."
"You're both grounded," I continue.


I am greeted with groans from both sides.
"I don't want to hear it," I say, "the two of you have to work out your differences, I don't care how you do it, just do it."



"I'm never forgiving her..." Bonnie says.
I look at her seriously, "I hope that's not true. One day you will find yourself in a place where you really need her, and I am going to make sure that you don't burn that bridge before you even get there."



Illena just glares at Bonnie. I don't even know what happened. I need to get to the bottom of this.



I send both girls to separate rooms and take Caroline to practice driving so that I can calm down...I realize that getting in the passenger seat with a teenage driver isn't exactly the way normal people relax, but I never said I was normal, now, did I? Hehe!



Back at the house, however, Illena is working on sneaking out...



Then she decides she wants to egg someone's house, one of our neighbors, no less!



The guy catches her and starts yelling at her. She tries to run away, so the guy calls the cops and the police officer brings her home.



By that time, I am home, thank goodness.
"Illena, what is going on with you?" I scold her, "You're already grounded, so I don't know what to do with you."
I walk away to think about how to handle my suddenly rebellious daughter.



She takes that opportunity to scare the crap out of Caroline.
"Illena, come here," I yell to her from the living room.



"Have a seat," I start, "we need to have a chat."



"Illena, I'm worried about you," I start, "I don't know what's gotten into you, honestly. You have always been a little hot-headed, but this recent behavior is completely unacceptable."



Illena doesn't say anything, so I keep talking, "I'm starting to run out of options, hon. I have grounded you, and you sneak out. You are fighting with your sister, egging people's houses...when does it end?"
Illena shuffles her feet and shrugs, "I don't know."



I glare at her, "well, that's not going to work. I'm starting to think maybe living here isn't the best thing for you right now."
Illena glares back at me, "You're going to kick me out?"
I clarify myself, "No, but I'm thinking maybe a stint in military school might straighten you out. I don't want to go that far, but if your behavior continues like this, I won't have a choice. Is that what you want?"



She looks at me seriously, "No! I don't want to go to military school! I would hate it! I'm just a kid! They would eat me alive in military school!"



"Mom, I swear I'll do better. I don't know what gets into me sometimes, but I promise I won't do it again. I'm really sorry," she pleas.
"Okay," I answer, "but there needs to be some serious attitude adjustment around here. I'm going to keep my eye on you for the next day or two and if you start slipping again, I'm not going to have a choice."
Illena nods, "that's fair, Mom. I promise I won't let you down."
"I'll take your word for it," I say, "now go on up to bed. We'll talk about this more later."
She gets up and heads upstairs.



Well, then my agent calls me and wants me to go to Vanity to try a new drink they have.
"What'll it be?" the barmaid asks.
"After the day I've had, the strongest drink you have." I joke and then order the Spine Reticulator, which is the drink I'm supposed to be sampling.



"Thanks, oh, make it virgin...I'm expecting!" I tell her.
The barmaid hands me a drink and it's delicious. I'm just pretending it has alcohol in it.
I finish my drink quickly, then go home and go to bed.



The next morning, I'm still exhausted. I could hardly sleep, the baby was moving all over the place, not allowing me to sleep, and I am so stressed about this whole Illena thing, I'm about to become unhinged.

Suddenly, the doorbell rings...



"Can I help you?" I greet the stranger at my doorstep. It's 6 am, too early for visitors, and much too early for strangers.



"Hi, my name is Markus Shom. I'm sorry to bother you, but I just had to meet you."
Markus Shom...Markus Shom...that name sounds familiar...oh, wait...that was the name of the last sperm donor! What is he doing on my doorstep?
"Mr. Shom, yes, I'm sorry, but I'm confused. Why did you have to meet me?" I ask. I don't want to divulge anything. Maybe he's crazy and he just happened across my doorstep and he doesn't even know I'm carrying his baby.



He shuffles his feet nervously. "I'm really sorry, I know this isn't allowed, but when I found out that you bought a vile of my donor sperm at the clinic, I had to meet you....you see...I've just been so lonely...and people don't talk to me...I live alone...I started donating sperm to make some money, but I continue to do it because I like to think that I'm actually making a contribution, ya' know? It makes me feel like I am impacting someone's life...because I can't do it for myself...I'm sorry...I know this wasn't right..."
"Markus..." I interrupt him.



Even though I think this is wildly inappropriate and I fully intend to have a discussion with the sperm bank about the meaning of "confidentiality," I can't help but feel sorry for this man. When I look into his eyes, I can see how lonely he is.



"Markus, I'm going to be honest with you," I start, "I am pregnant with your child or children right now, but when I went to the clinic, I was assured that my identity would remain anonymous. That's one of the things my money pays for, and I'm not going to let you in my house because I quite frankly don't know you and I don't want to put my children at risk..."



He interrupts me, "I know, you've got some beautiful daughters, and I heard one of them when you answered the door."



It's my turn to interrupt him, "Okay, Markus, you're not helping your case here, and you're creeping me out a little bit. Be careful or I will holler for the most hormonal daughter I have..."



"I know, I'm sorry...I just want what you have so badly. I want a wife waiting for me at home, pregnant with my child, a beautiful house full of children, I want to come home from work and sit down to a home cooked meal, have my sons and daughter climb in my lap. I want a little person to call me Daddy," He starts crying, "I'm sorry. I never should have come. This was a bad idea."



I stop him, "Wait a second Markus. I can't say that I agree with you coming here, and I am not looking for any kind of relationship right now, but I can be your friend. How about after I have this baby, the two of us go out on the town, grab some dinner, maybe go dancing. Just hang out as friends?"
He looks at me excitedly, like I just told him I was giving him a puppy, "Really?! You would do that for me?"
I smile at him, "I could use a friend too, Markus. Here's the thing though, I want you to go on home, I'm going to go back inside and handle my screaming toddler, and I will call you after the baby is born."
He looks at me warily, "Are you sure? This isn't a brush off, is it?"
I shake my head, "Of course not. Leave me your number and I promise I will call."
He left me his phone number, we waved goodbye and he turned to leave.



As he turns away, I can't help but hope I'm not going to regret this.



I wasn't kidding when I told him I needed to get back to my screaming toddler. Thank goodness Bonnie was tending to her when I came in. It was Pearl's birthday, so as soon as everyone was off to school, I would age her up.



Of course, I had to do some housework first...



As Pearl aged into a child, she still has those beautiful green eyes and chestnut brown hair. She is going to be a real beauty as she ages. I can only hope I can raise her properly. All this Illena stuff has me second guessing my parenting abilities.



As I try to pick up around the house, I keep feeling like something is behind me...



Out of the blue, Pearl pops out. "Boo!" I nearly jump out of my skin. She squeals and grins fiendishly. Heaven help me.



I sit her down with a book while I try to work off some of this baby weight...



Is it normal to be slightly afraid of a child? Somehow that look in her eyes looks menacing.
Okay, Hadley, breathe. Treat her like every one of your other children. Love her unconditionally. She'll be fine....she does look creepy though...



"What's the matter Mommy?" Pearl asks innocently.
"Nothing sweetheart," I answer, desperately trying to disguise the shaking in my voice, "go play while Mommy takes a bath, okay?"
She smiles, but her smile isn't like any other I have ever seen. Most smiles are contagious and make me want to smile...this smile shoots fear right to my heart.
I am relieved when she runs outside.



After I work out, I decide to take a bubble bath. I need to soak the last few days off of me. My God, I have been so stressed. Why does a huge load of crap have to land on me all at once?



After my bath, I try to cook dinner without burning it again...I actually succeed!



When Illena comes home directly after school, I let her off the hook.
"You've been doing really well lately hon, I'm proud of you!" I tell her.



However, Bonnie still hasn't made it home...I'm going to have to reprimand her when she gets here...



When I see her coming up the walkway, I run out to scold her, "Do you know the meaning of the word 'grounded' young lady? That means after school you come right home!"
"But Mom, I was studying..." she starts.
"No excuses," I say, "I'm revoking your television privileges for the night."
"Aw..." she starts.
"It would be wise not to speak," I tell her before I usher her inside.



Pearl wants to sleep in my bed and she wants a bedtime story, so I read her one. She seems so sweet now. Maybe all that stuff before was my imagination.



I kiss her goodnight and get ready for bed myself.



Then my water breaks! I holler at Illena, Bonnie, and Caroline to tell them I'm going to the hospital and then I head that way.



After several long hours of labor, I bring home Baby #13: Tyler Reed....



...and Baby #14 Matt Reed!

Well, that had a little bit of everything in it! I hope y'all enjoy it!