Who Says You Can't Go Home?

I feel like I don't know myself anymore. I mean, look at me...I've got a fake tan, I've bleached the crap out of my hair, I barely eat anymore, so I'm skinny as a rail...for what? To fit into this joke of a city.

I'm not happy here, and I know that. I don't know why I keep fighting it. I keep thinking things are going to get better. This isn't me. I'm not the type of person that worries so much about her image. I usually couldn't care less what anyone thinks about me. So why is it getting to me now? Hmm, I guess I was following the whole "When in Rome, do as Romans do" mentality. Well, no more. I've made a decision...

First things first. I need to get rid of this freakin' bleached hair...so I go back to my natural black. I also lighten up on the makeup. I don't need to look like a friggin' doll anymore. Next up, I'm attacking my wardrobe.

I switch to a comfortable pair of khaki shorts and an old white tank top and plaid shirt. I'm really liking it.

I also wash off this fake tan crap. That stuff just wasn't me. So I'm a more natural version of myself. *Sigh* It's about time.

I've been dreaming about home a lot lately. Bridgeport isn't my home. I've tried to make it that way, but it's just not working. I'm a small town girl. I need sunshine and wide open fields. I was happy in Cornucopia, but obviously I can't go back there, at least not right now. Hmm, my mama always told me you always know what the right decision is, it's making it that's the hard thing. She's right...

So I pull out my phone and dial a number that is so familiar to me, even though I don't call it near enough.

"Hello?" a voice picks up after a couple rings.
"Mama?" I reply.
The voice is quiet for a second, "Hadley? Hey baby girl! How are you?"
I choke back tears. Why is it that, even as a grown up, when life has been rough on you, no matter how strong you are, whenever you start talking to your mother just the sound of her voice just allows you to fall apart?
And like she always did when I was a kid, she could tell something was wrong, "Sweetie, what is it?"
I sniffle, "I'm sorry, I just...really miss you."
Mom replies, "I miss you too, honey. What's been going on? What's gotten you so upset, love?"

With those words, everything comes out. She and Daddy knew about the challenge, but life has been so crazy that I have lost touch with them...so she didn't know about everything else, so I told her. I didn't leave out anything. I told her about the vampires, having to leave the place I called home, living in Bridgeport...everything. When I finished it all, I told her what I wanted to do.

Me: Mama, I want to come back home.
Mom: Oh sweetie, you know we would love having you back. If that's what you want to do, what can I do to help?
Me: Well, I'm going to need a place to live...
Mom: I've got you covered on that one sweetie, you'll never believe what Aunt Z and I have been doing to occupy our time since all you kids have grown up...
Me: *laughing* Oh no, what?
Mom: Don't give me that, *chuckling* We've started a little architectural firm. We buy land, Aunt Z designs a house, and I decorate it...so we can certainly get something up for you. Actually, I already know the perfect spot.
Me: Aww, Mama...really?
Mom: Don't you worry about a thing, sweet pea...tell you what...get hold of your Aunt Z and talk to her about what kind of house you'll want, and we'll get the ball rolling.
Me: Okay Mama...thank you...so much...you don't know what all this means to me.
Mom: Don't even mention it, babe. You know I've always got your back.
Me: Yeah...I love you.
Mom: I love you too baby.

As soon as I got off the phone, I call my Aunt Z. She isn't my real aunt...she's actually my mom's best friend...they've been best friends since...well, I don't even know...as long as I can remember. Remember when my best friend Evie came to visit me? Well, Aunt Z is her mom.

Z: Hey there, girl.
Me: Aunt Z? You answered that like you knew it would be me.
Z: Your mom just called me...
Me: *laughing* Dang, y'all haven't changed a bit have you? You two can't keep anything from each other. So you know what's going on.
Z: *laughing* You know good and well that's how it's always been. So yeah, I know what's going on. Sounds like you need a house.
Me: Yeah, do you think you can do it? Would it be too much trouble?
Z: Shoo, you know I'd do anything for you. I got this. We'll have you a house up by the time you get here.

Me: Are you sure? I'm going to try and get everything here wrapped up ASAP.
Z: Oh yeah, no problem. How many kids are you going to be bringing with you?
Me: Hmm, I think probably five. I just had a set of triplets, and I've got twin boys that are still young...I have a couple teenagers, but I figure they'll age up before I get there.
Z: Dang!
Me: *joking* We can come stay with you if the house isn't finished, right?
Z: *chokes and laughs* Well, if that ain't incentive to get your house done, I don't know what is.
Me: I'm just kidding, Aunt Z.
Z: Tell you what, you can come stay with me and the kids can stay with your mama...
Me: *laughing* deal!
Z: Okay, it's settled then...so, tell me about what kind of house you're wanting.

I talked with Aunt Z for awhile about the kind of things I am wanting and she told me she would e-mail me a draft in a day or so.

The next task I had was telling the kids.
Blaine: So we're moving to a farm?
Me: No...not really, but there's lots of room to run and explore...catch bugs, butterflies...
Blaine: Gems?
Me: Yeah, I guess gems if you want...

So the kids were okay with it...then it was birthday time. Merci and the triplets were aging up.

She aged into a beautiful girl with a good head on her shoulders. She is entering the medical field.

Shelby grew into an adorable little girl. She's a little more tomboyish because of all her brothers, but that doesn't stop her from looking cute.

Next was Sam. He's the ring leader and the rock. He seems really level-headed already though. Hopefully he will remain a good influence throughout their lives.

Sonny was last. He didn't have any hair, but he is fun-loving and mischievous. I can't wait to see how he turns out later.

Life continued kind of normally for the next few days. Shelby has taken a liking to blocks...and chewing on blocks...

Blaine, Jessie, and Kurt were going to school, saying goodbye to anyone they actually knew. They never really got close to anyone here, so that wasn't a big deal.

I was busy getting everything ready to go. Aunt Z e-mailed me and told me she would have pictures of the house very soon...I kept waiting...

Sort of patiently...

Of course, I kept having ideas and sending them to her...
I've also been talking to Evie...she's super excited I'm moving back.

Finally, Aunt Z texts that she has the house done and she sent me a teaser picture of what the outside looks like...she said Mom wants to surprise me with the decor...ever my Mama...hehe...but I anxiously get on my e-mail...

When I see it, my jaw drops...it's perfect...it's huge, but elegant...it's...it's...I'm seriously speechless.

This is it...I told her I really liked the Victorian style...but I needed at least five bedrooms...a ton of bathrooms, a big back yard, a pool...and she gave me everything...I am amazed...

Looking at the house, I can't help but tear up. It's amazing to me that I've been so neglectful of everyone there and as soon as I call, they accept me again with open arms...and build me a house. I am probably one of the luckiest people in the world.

The last thing that needs to happen before I leave Bridgeport is for Kurt to age up. Ironically, he grows up and looks just like my daddy, minus the freckles. Apparently freckles are seriously recessive...oh well...I take this as a sign that I'm doing the right thing.

Before I leave, I get an e-mail from my mom.

Dear Hadley,
Hey sweet face. Just wanted to let you know how excited we all are that you're coming back to us. You don't know how much we've missed you. Your daddy is so excited, he's about to bust and he won't stop talking about getting to see you. Lila and Keaton are excited too! I was doing some spring cleaning the other day and I came across a couple pictures I thought you would like to see, so I'm attaching them. Love you baby girl! - Mom

I scrolled down and saw the pictures...and if I wasn't already determined to move home, those pictures would have closed the deal. I'm guessing that's why Mama sent them.

The first one is of my family from a very long time ago...it's my mom and dad; my older sister, Lila; my older brother, Keaton...and there giggling and holding on to her daddy is me as a toddler. I can't help but smile. I really miss these people. Why did I ever leave them in the first place?

The next one is of my Aunt Z's family...well, her real name is Zoey...but it's her, she's holding on to Evie in this picture...and her husband...his name is Taurrence, but I've always known him as Uncle T-Bone...and there's their son, Mason.

Man, I really can't wait to go home now.

***I WOULD LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS ENTRY TO MY FAMILY. THEY ARE THE INSPIRATION FOR THE AWESOMENESS THAT IS HADLEY'S FAMILY.***