Who Says You Can't Go Home?

I feel like I don't know myself anymore. I mean, look at me...I've got a fake tan, I've bleached the crap out of my hair, I barely eat anymore, so I'm skinny as a rail...for what? To fit into this joke of a city.

I'm not happy here, and I know that. I don't know why I keep fighting it. I keep thinking things are going to get better. This isn't me. I'm not the type of person that worries so much about her image. I usually couldn't care less what anyone thinks about me. So why is it getting to me now? Hmm, I guess I was following the whole "When in Rome, do as Romans do" mentality. Well, no more. I've made a decision...

First things first. I need to get rid of this freakin' bleached hair...so I go back to my natural black. I also lighten up on the makeup. I don't need to look like a friggin' doll anymore. Next up, I'm attacking my wardrobe.

I switch to a comfortable pair of khaki shorts and an old white tank top and plaid shirt. I'm really liking it.

I also wash off this fake tan crap. That stuff just wasn't me. So I'm a more natural version of myself. *Sigh* It's about time.

I've been dreaming about home a lot lately. Bridgeport isn't my home. I've tried to make it that way, but it's just not working. I'm a small town girl. I need sunshine and wide open fields. I was happy in Cornucopia, but obviously I can't go back there, at least not right now. Hmm, my mama always told me you always know what the right decision is, it's making it that's the hard thing. She's right...

So I pull out my phone and dial a number that is so familiar to me, even though I don't call it near enough.

"Hello?" a voice picks up after a couple rings.
"Mama?" I reply.
The voice is quiet for a second, "Hadley? Hey baby girl! How are you?"
I choke back tears. Why is it that, even as a grown up, when life has been rough on you, no matter how strong you are, whenever you start talking to your mother just the sound of her voice just allows you to fall apart?
And like she always did when I was a kid, she could tell something was wrong, "Sweetie, what is it?"
I sniffle, "I'm sorry, I just...really miss you."
Mom replies, "I miss you too, honey. What's been going on? What's gotten you so upset, love?"

With those words, everything comes out. She and Daddy knew about the challenge, but life has been so crazy that I have lost touch with them...so she didn't know about everything else, so I told her. I didn't leave out anything. I told her about the vampires, having to leave the place I called home, living in Bridgeport...everything. When I finished it all, I told her what I wanted to do.

Me: Mama, I want to come back home.
Mom: Oh sweetie, you know we would love having you back. If that's what you want to do, what can I do to help?
Me: Well, I'm going to need a place to live...
Mom: I've got you covered on that one sweetie, you'll never believe what Aunt Z and I have been doing to occupy our time since all you kids have grown up...
Me: *laughing* Oh no, what?
Mom: Don't give me that, *chuckling* We've started a little architectural firm. We buy land, Aunt Z designs a house, and I decorate it...so we can certainly get something up for you. Actually, I already know the perfect spot.
Me: Aww, Mama...really?
Mom: Don't you worry about a thing, sweet pea...tell you what...get hold of your Aunt Z and talk to her about what kind of house you'll want, and we'll get the ball rolling.
Me: Okay Mama...thank you...so much...you don't know what all this means to me.
Mom: Don't even mention it, babe. You know I've always got your back.
Me: Yeah...I love you.
Mom: I love you too baby.

As soon as I got off the phone, I call my Aunt Z. She isn't my real aunt...she's actually my mom's best friend...they've been best friends since...well, I don't even know...as long as I can remember. Remember when my best friend Evie came to visit me? Well, Aunt Z is her mom.

Z: Hey there, girl.
Me: Aunt Z? You answered that like you knew it would be me.
Z: Your mom just called me...
Me: *laughing* Dang, y'all haven't changed a bit have you? You two can't keep anything from each other. So you know what's going on.
Z: *laughing* You know good and well that's how it's always been. So yeah, I know what's going on. Sounds like you need a house.
Me: Yeah, do you think you can do it? Would it be too much trouble?
Z: Shoo, you know I'd do anything for you. I got this. We'll have you a house up by the time you get here.

Me: Are you sure? I'm going to try and get everything here wrapped up ASAP.
Z: Oh yeah, no problem. How many kids are you going to be bringing with you?
Me: Hmm, I think probably five. I just had a set of triplets, and I've got twin boys that are still young...I have a couple teenagers, but I figure they'll age up before I get there.
Z: Dang!
Me: *joking* We can come stay with you if the house isn't finished, right?
Z: *chokes and laughs* Well, if that ain't incentive to get your house done, I don't know what is.
Me: I'm just kidding, Aunt Z.
Z: Tell you what, you can come stay with me and the kids can stay with your mama...
Me: *laughing* deal!
Z: Okay, it's settled then...so, tell me about what kind of house you're wanting.

I talked with Aunt Z for awhile about the kind of things I am wanting and she told me she would e-mail me a draft in a day or so.

The next task I had was telling the kids.
Blaine: So we're moving to a farm?
Me: No...not really, but there's lots of room to run and explore...catch bugs, butterflies...
Blaine: Gems?
Me: Yeah, I guess gems if you want...

So the kids were okay with it...then it was birthday time. Merci and the triplets were aging up.

She aged into a beautiful girl with a good head on her shoulders. She is entering the medical field.

Shelby grew into an adorable little girl. She's a little more tomboyish because of all her brothers, but that doesn't stop her from looking cute.

Next was Sam. He's the ring leader and the rock. He seems really level-headed already though. Hopefully he will remain a good influence throughout their lives.

Sonny was last. He didn't have any hair, but he is fun-loving and mischievous. I can't wait to see how he turns out later.

Life continued kind of normally for the next few days. Shelby has taken a liking to blocks...and chewing on blocks...

Blaine, Jessie, and Kurt were going to school, saying goodbye to anyone they actually knew. They never really got close to anyone here, so that wasn't a big deal.

I was busy getting everything ready to go. Aunt Z e-mailed me and told me she would have pictures of the house very soon...I kept waiting...

Sort of patiently...

Of course, I kept having ideas and sending them to her...
I've also been talking to Evie...she's super excited I'm moving back.

Finally, Aunt Z texts that she has the house done and she sent me a teaser picture of what the outside looks like...she said Mom wants to surprise me with the decor...ever my Mama...hehe...but I anxiously get on my e-mail...

When I see it, my jaw drops...it's perfect...it's huge, but elegant...it's...it's...I'm seriously speechless.

This is it...I told her I really liked the Victorian style...but I needed at least five bedrooms...a ton of bathrooms, a big back yard, a pool...and she gave me everything...I am amazed...

Looking at the house, I can't help but tear up. It's amazing to me that I've been so neglectful of everyone there and as soon as I call, they accept me again with open arms...and build me a house. I am probably one of the luckiest people in the world.

The last thing that needs to happen before I leave Bridgeport is for Kurt to age up. Ironically, he grows up and looks just like my daddy, minus the freckles. Apparently freckles are seriously recessive...oh well...I take this as a sign that I'm doing the right thing.

Before I leave, I get an e-mail from my mom.

Dear Hadley,
Hey sweet face. Just wanted to let you know how excited we all are that you're coming back to us. You don't know how much we've missed you. Your daddy is so excited, he's about to bust and he won't stop talking about getting to see you. Lila and Keaton are excited too! I was doing some spring cleaning the other day and I came across a couple pictures I thought you would like to see, so I'm attaching them. Love you baby girl! - Mom

I scrolled down and saw the pictures...and if I wasn't already determined to move home, those pictures would have closed the deal. I'm guessing that's why Mama sent them.

The first one is of my family from a very long time ago...it's my mom and dad; my older sister, Lila; my older brother, Keaton...and there giggling and holding on to her daddy is me as a toddler. I can't help but smile. I really miss these people. Why did I ever leave them in the first place?

The next one is of my Aunt Z's family...well, her real name is Zoey...but it's her, she's holding on to Evie in this picture...and her husband...his name is Taurrence, but I've always known him as Uncle T-Bone...and there's their son, Mason.

Man, I really can't wait to go home now.

***I WOULD LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS ENTRY TO MY FAMILY. THEY ARE THE INSPIRATION FOR THE AWESOMENESS THAT IS HADLEY'S FAMILY.***

Babies 39, 40, & 41: Gimme Some Cake!!!

Lately I've been working with Blaine and Jessie nonstop on their skills. It's difficult sometimes because they both get distracted easily. I have been doing a little better, looking into the eyes of my sweet babies always makes it all worth it!

All the kids have been working hard on their studies as well. Puck and Merci often work together while Kurt sits in the hallway by himself...he's kind of a loner that way. I worry about him a bit because I know all about his family history, as does everyone else who owns a computer or a television, I would hate it if he followed the path of his father.

Before I knew it, it was time for Puck to move out. Even though I am so proud of him, I hate to see him leave.

Puck grew up to be a very attractive young man. He's very captivating and I'm sure he would do well in politics.

Being pregnant, my cravings have been in overkill lately...look at me fixated on this cake! Be afraid, icing! Be very afraid!

It was also birthday time for the twins, so here's Blaine...with the brown eyes.

And here's Jessie...seriously the only difference in them is the eye color.

Puck enjoys a piece of cake with us right before he leaves. Merci tells Jessie about having to go to school. "Yeah, school is okay except for all the homework, but we'll help you." she tells him. Being the only girl in the family right now, she is very protective over her brothers.

After we eat cake and the boys go to bed, Merci tells me this scary story about the ghost of a young girl haunting an abandoned school bus.

I'm glad I sent the boys to bed because it terrified me! She is very imaginative, that girl.

Once she finishes the story, we go to bed, but I'm not asleep for long when labor pains kick in.

Something's wrong...the pains are coming too fast, I don't know if I'm going to be able to make it to the hospital...

I can't help but worry about my baby when a woosh of pain goes through me...what if something is wrong?

Apparently Baby 39 was just anxious to be born. Meet my little girl, Shelby.

Suddenly, after I put Shelby in her crib, I felt yet another sharp pain....what in the world?

Before I knew it, out came another little bundle, this time a joyful, winking little boy, Baby 40: Sam!

But alas, I was still not done...

Last, but certainly not least...even though he looked like he was born asleep, Baby 41: Sonny!

My second ever set of triplets!

Babies 37 & 38: City Life is Really Getting to Me

Kurt hit his toddler years before I knew it. Like so many of my children, he looks just like me except that his hair is dark brown like his father's.

He was generally a sweet boy...as long as he got his way...

I realized I couldn't take him out in public a whole lot because the paparazzi always bombarded us. He about had a fit when I told him he had to get off the seahorse!

Look at that face! LOL...I don't know how he can stick his lip out that far.

The paparazzi wouldn't stop snapping pictures until I grossed them out by puking...hey, it's part of my super mom powers! LOL So, I guess it goes without saying, but I'm pregnant again! This time around it was a mail-order daddy! I'm kind of off the club scene right now. It turns out that even though I did have a little too much to drink, Mr. Sheen, winner that he is, slipped something into my drinks...that's why I had so much trouble remembering. Yeah, he's a hell of a winner. Word to the wise: guys can buy you drinks, just make sure you see it going from the bartender's hands to yours.

This next baby daddy is Helmut Whitaker. He's kind of cute, but he looks so serious! I wonder if the children I have from him will share his serious glare.

My sweet Merci aged into a teenager...she also had to have some "corrective" surgery because her doctor told me she would have issues later on with eating, breathing, and seeing. I'm not really sure how much I actually believe him or how much he was just dying to do reconstructive surgery on her because she didn't fit in with all the plastic people around here.

This is what she looked like afterward. She is happy with it, so I guess that's all that matters. Still, it has me thinking.

Kurt also grew up quickly on me. He still looks like me, but he has Charlie's hair. I guess I'm thankful of that this time. I kind of don't want any reminders of my indiscretion.

I have been trying to have some good wholesome family fun lately, so the kids and I went to HydroWorld.

We swam all day...it was a blast! It's not every day you can be outside in the city, so I was thankful for this one.

Soon enough, I went into labor...yeowch! That pain always surprises me...you would think it wouldn't, especially for a person that's been through this so many times.

While I was in the hospital, Puck ordered pizza for himself, Merci, and Kurt. He also tried to charm the delivery woman. I swear, that kid has something about him! LOL

After giving birth, the last thing you want to do is get on the dang subway, but I had to just to get home. Grr.

Without further ado, I'd like to introduce Baby 37: Blaine Reed...

...and his twin brother, Baby 38: Jessie Reed!

I aged them up pretty quickly. They were almost identical except Blaine has brown eyes from his father.

Jessie has my eyes...of course, the boys look just like me.

The boys are as sweet as they can be, but I have been really out of it lately. I'm tired of living in the city, not having a back yard, having to ride the subway...and not having any room to turn around in this apartment. I'm going to have to think about what I want to do...meanwhile, I order another vile of baby daddy...

This guy's name is Cordell Lawrence...quite a honker on him, isn't it? LOL I'm hoping for some more unique genetics.

As for what I'm going to do...I still don't know...I've thought about moving into one of the houses across the bridge, but that won't keep me from having to take the friggin' subway every time I have a baby.

Oh, here's another thing...Kurt buzzed right through elementary school and into his teen years. He's apparently very advanced. Even though he looks like me, there's a certain roughness about him that I can only assume is from his father.

***Still having some major freezing issues, but I'm hoping they will be resolved soon. I keep having to delete everyone in the town...probably why Hadley's kids all end up looking just like her.***